Don’t Tell Me

Rasul Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said: “Let none of my Companions inform me of anything another of them has said, for I wish to come out to you without disquiet in my heart.” [Abu Dawud]

It is hardly possible that one hear negative things about a person and then meet them with a heart completely untainted by bad feeling. There will be at least a sliver of negative feelings about the person in your heart. The reward for keeping a heart free of grudges is so enormous that it is not worth hearing about the doings of others.

If somebody was rude to you, or misjudged you, or unjustifiably accused you of something, it is bad enough that you have to deal with it. But by talking about it and involving other people in it you ruin their peace of mind and purity of heart as well.

Complaining to others is only justifiable if there is compensation that is due to you which you cannot get otherwise, or if by complaining to others you are protecting them from some harm. Otherwise you may be getting the sin for 1. backbiting, 2. exaggerating what was done, or 3. spreading feelings of animosity among Muslims.

Human beings will always do things that hurt others. If you can bear the hurt in the hope of Allah’s reward, He will undoubtedly more than make up for it to you.